Wah, I felt like my life just ruined =.=

24th January 2010,
2 more years to world demolitions xD haha was joking. By the way, my life just like a corpse's life, everyday, every time, every second I don't felt like i'm in my body until now I just felt i had just got into my body =.= bad things happened day by day, and it's gonna be worst when the end came. I don't know what action I had to take now, and what shouldn't be taken. I just know when she's mad i'm totally nobody, when she's in a good mood, I'll try to make myself like a machine to control myself from crapping and make her angry again. Every time I tried, every time it failed just like my luck, when I cheer her up, it won't last long cause she really care for me, I know that when she's angry means she's still care about what I had done, but no for her anger cause I always being slapped by her, but it's okay for her to do so because i knew that she's angry with me, but what to do when she's angry and doesn't want to reply me as I'm at home and it's weekend AND I can't even met her... I can't think so much letting go of her just spoiling my future life, being with her is a happy life after all, just waiting for her reply ... keep on waiting ...